If You Dated Yourself, Would You Go on a Second Date? by Isaac Galena
Good Question. Would you? It's certainly a puzzling inquiry, and the topic of a recent Upper West Side Chabad Friday lecture. Rabbi Shmuel Stauber, a relationship therapist, explained that in relationships you need to fall off the horse a couple times in order to learn to ride.Breaking every person into a "Fight" or "Flight" personality type, or as he called them "Turtles"(introverts) and "Hailstorms" (extroverts), Rabbi Stauber concluded that if you are one personality type your partner must be the opposite. So, you would not go out on a second date with yourself in the long run, according to Rabbi Stauber, because although you'll always crave to be with someone like yourself, you will ultimately end up needing someone from the opposite side of the persona spectrum.
Don't buy it? Well here, for your reading pleasure, are some classic examples I came up with for you to chew on - all turtles and hailstorms: Rocky & Adrian, Han Solo & Princess Leah, Kermit & Miss Piggy, Satine & Christian, Agassi & Graff, Chandler & Monica, Beauty & The Beast, John & Yoko, Homer & Marge. It is true. Think about it. I know this theory is completely debatable on a variety of levels, but you have to admit the question is an awfully interesting one to ponder. Before you answer for yourself, I'll give you a head start. I sent out an email to a group of friends with the question and I'd like to share some of their responses with you:
* I wouldn't even go on a first date with myself
* I would probably want to be really good friends, have myself over for Shabbat dinner.
* I'd say - when are we going out again? You're the most fun date EVER!!!!
* Religion would definitely be an issue.
* You thought that was a date? I thought we were just hanging out. Oops!
* I think I would be pretty annoyed not being original anymore, but if I could get over that, I think I would go on a second date. But then I would dump myself eventually because I would be afraid that I was the type to dump me.
* Probably for a few dates, but then it would just get awkward with a lot of 'Am I really the One for Me?' commitment phobias
* Yeah, it'd be fun. I could do anything. I would never have to try to impress anyone, or not be myself, and I'd never get into fights! Wait, but after a while I'd get lonely. But I would definitely go on at least the second date!
* I always go out on a second date, even if it's with a complete loser. Take what you will from it. I know I'd go out with myself for a few dates, you know, "to see and be seen", but then of course break up due to "irreconcilable differences." So, now it's your turn. Answer for yourself at...
the conslusion of this article.
Isaac Galena is the co-founder of bangitout.com
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